Helping a Teen Cutter

Dear Dr. Bill:

I'm 14 years old. I need some help, and I know I can trust you guys. I met this older guy at high school who told me he's cut himself several times. I don't know why he's doing it or how to help him stop. What should I do?

— Emily

Dear Emily:

It seems like more and more teens these days are engaging in cutting, or what psychologists call "self-mutilation." It's difficult to understand exactly why a person would do this to themselves, but it seems to be a response to overwhelming feelings of anxiety or depression.

Chances are that your friend is experiencing a great deal of stress in his life, perhaps in his family. Or, he may have experienced some kind of traumatic event in his past, and he uses cutting as a way to cope with his feelings.

Your friend needs to get professional help right away. I suggest that you encourage him to see a school counselor to discuss the problem. Tell him that you will go with him to the counselor's office to support him. If he refuses to go, let him know that because you care for him and don't want to see him hurt himself, you will need to talk to the counselor yourself.

This may seem like you're "ratting" on him, but it's actually the most loving thing you can do. Sometimes kids who engage in cutting will accidentally cut themselves too deeply, and end up bleeding to death. You need to let a responsible adult know what is going on so they can get him the help he needs.

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